The moment a child is born, one question is usually asked before any other, "Is it a boy or a girl?" Doctors ask it. Relatives ask it. Friends ask it. Even people who have never met the family become interested in knowing whether the child is male or female. In many cultures, celebrations become bigger or smaller depending on the answer. Some families become happier when a boy is born. Others prefer girls. In some places, parents immediately begin planning the child's future based on gender. Before the child has spoken a single word, society has already begun placing expectations upon him or her.
While there is nothing wrong with recognizing whether a child is a boy or a girl, problems begin when gender becomes more important than purpose. Many people spend their entire lives focusing on what God considered secondary while ignoring what God considered primary. God created gender, but He never intended gender to become more important than purpose.
When God looks at a newborn child, He certainly sees whether the child is male or female because He created both. However, God also sees something that human beings often miss. He sees the assignment attached to that life. He sees the reason that child has come into the world. He sees the people whose lives will be affected by that child. He sees the future that lies ahead. While people celebrate the gender of the child, heaven celebrates the purpose of the child.
This is one reason why many parents struggle in raising children. They spend years preparing children for gender expectations while spending very little time preparing them for God's purpose. A boy may be taught what society expects from men. A girl may be taught what society expects from women. Yet neither may be taught to discover what God expects from them. As a result, children grow up knowing their gender but not knowing their purpose.
Purpose is what gives meaning to life. Without purpose, people simply exist. They wake up, go to school, work, eat, sleep, and grow old without understanding why they were sent to earth. A person can know everything about his family history and still not know his purpose. A person can understand every cultural expectation and still not know why God created him. Purpose answers questions that gender cannot answer. Being a boy does not explain why God sent you into the world. Being a girl does not explain why God sent you into the world. Purpose explains why.
A child may be born male and become a great leader because that is part of God's plan. Another child may be born male and become a compassionate caregiver because that is God's plan. One girl may become a teacher. Another may become a business leader. Another may become a store attendant. Another may become a scientist. Gender tells us something about the child, but purpose tells us why the child exists.
The danger comes when parents begin raising children according to stereotypes instead of purpose. Sometimes children are pushed into certain directions simply because of whether they are boys or girls. Their natural gifts are ignored. Their unique talents are overlooked. Their God-given abilities remain undeveloped. The child slowly becomes what society expects instead of what God intended.
This does not mean that gender has no value. God intentionally created male and female. Both are beautiful expressions of His creation. Both have dignity. Both have worth. Both are equally loved by God. The problem is not gender itself. The problem is making gender more important than purpose.
The Bible gives many examples of people whose significance came from purpose rather than gender. When God called Moses, He did not choose him simply because he was male. God chose him because of the assignment He had prepared for him. When God raised Esther to become queen, her significance was not found merely in being female. Her significance was found in the purpose God had prepared for her. When David was chosen, God was not looking at outward appearance. He was looking at the heart and the purpose He intended to fulfill through David's life.
The world often judges children according to outward characteristics. God looks deeper. Human beings see age, appearance, family background, wealth, and gender. God sees calling. Human beings see limitations. God sees possibilities. Human beings see present circumstances. God sees future purpose.
This is why parents must learn to look at children through God's eyes. When a child is born, parents should celebrate. They should thank God for the precious gift that has entered their lives. But beyond celebrating the child's gender, they should begin asking a more important question, "Lord, why did You send this child?" That question can transform parenting.
A parent who asks that question becomes a student of God's purpose. Instead of forcing plans onto the child, the parent begins seeking God's direction. Instead of comparing the child with others, the parent begins observing the unique qualities God has placed within the child. Instead of demanding conformity, the parent begins nurturing individuality according to God's design.
Many parents become disappointed because their children do not fit expectations. A father may want his son to love the same things he loves. A mother may want her daughter to follow the same path she followed. Sometimes children cooperate with those expectations. Sometimes they do not. When they do not, conflict arises. Yet much of that conflict would disappear if parents remembered that children belong to God before they belong to their families.The child was not sent to fulfill the dreams of parents. The child was sent to fulfill the purpose of God.
This truth requires humility. It requires parents to admit that they do not have complete knowledge of the child. Only God does. It requires them to spend time praying, observing, listening, and learning. It requires them to understand that every child is carrying something from God that deserves careful attention.
Purpose often reveals itself gradually. It may appear in a child's interests. It may appear in natural abilities. It may appear in compassion toward certain people. It may appear in unusual curiosity about particular subjects. Sometimes the signs are visible early in life. Sometimes they become clearer over many years. Whatever the case, wise parents remain attentive. They understand that they are not simply raising a boy or a girl. They are raising a person sent by God for a specific reason.
This understanding also protects children from feelings of worthlessness. When people define themselves only by external characteristics, they can easily become discouraged. Appearance changes. Social status changes. Human opinions change. But purpose remains. A child who understands that God created him or her for a reason develops a deeper sense of value. That child begins to understand that life is meaningful because God does nothing without purpose.
Every child needs to hear this truth repeatedly. Children need to know that they are more than their appearance. They are more than their family name. They are more than their academic performance. They are more than their gender. They are individuals created by God with purpose, value, and destiny.
The greatest gift parents can give their children is not wealth, education, or influence, though those things may be helpful. The greatest gift is helping children discover why God created them. A child who understands purpose possesses something more valuable than money. That child possesses direction. Purpose gives meaning to success and strength during difficulties. Purpose helps a person remain focused when life becomes confusing.
As parents, guardians, grandparents, teachers, and caregivers, we must train ourselves to see beyond gender. We must learn to see children as God sees them. We must celebrate the fact that they are boys or girls while never forgetting that their greatest identity is not found in gender but in the purpose for which God sent them. The question heaven asks about every child is not merely, "Is this a boy or a girl?" The greater question is, "What assignment has God attached to this life?"
When we begin asking that question, we start raising children according to God's design rather than according to human expectations. And when children are raised according to God's design, they have a much greater chance of becoming everything God intended them to be.
While there is nothing wrong with recognizing whether a child is a boy or a girl, problems begin when gender becomes more important than purpose. Many people spend their entire lives focusing on what God considered secondary while ignoring what God considered primary. God created gender, but He never intended gender to become more important than purpose.
When God looks at a newborn child, He certainly sees whether the child is male or female because He created both. However, God also sees something that human beings often miss. He sees the assignment attached to that life. He sees the reason that child has come into the world. He sees the people whose lives will be affected by that child. He sees the future that lies ahead. While people celebrate the gender of the child, heaven celebrates the purpose of the child.
This is one reason why many parents struggle in raising children. They spend years preparing children for gender expectations while spending very little time preparing them for God's purpose. A boy may be taught what society expects from men. A girl may be taught what society expects from women. Yet neither may be taught to discover what God expects from them. As a result, children grow up knowing their gender but not knowing their purpose.
Purpose is what gives meaning to life. Without purpose, people simply exist. They wake up, go to school, work, eat, sleep, and grow old without understanding why they were sent to earth. A person can know everything about his family history and still not know his purpose. A person can understand every cultural expectation and still not know why God created him. Purpose answers questions that gender cannot answer. Being a boy does not explain why God sent you into the world. Being a girl does not explain why God sent you into the world. Purpose explains why.
A child may be born male and become a great leader because that is part of God's plan. Another child may be born male and become a compassionate caregiver because that is God's plan. One girl may become a teacher. Another may become a business leader. Another may become a store attendant. Another may become a scientist. Gender tells us something about the child, but purpose tells us why the child exists.
The danger comes when parents begin raising children according to stereotypes instead of purpose. Sometimes children are pushed into certain directions simply because of whether they are boys or girls. Their natural gifts are ignored. Their unique talents are overlooked. Their God-given abilities remain undeveloped. The child slowly becomes what society expects instead of what God intended.
This does not mean that gender has no value. God intentionally created male and female. Both are beautiful expressions of His creation. Both have dignity. Both have worth. Both are equally loved by God. The problem is not gender itself. The problem is making gender more important than purpose.
The Bible gives many examples of people whose significance came from purpose rather than gender. When God called Moses, He did not choose him simply because he was male. God chose him because of the assignment He had prepared for him. When God raised Esther to become queen, her significance was not found merely in being female. Her significance was found in the purpose God had prepared for her. When David was chosen, God was not looking at outward appearance. He was looking at the heart and the purpose He intended to fulfill through David's life.
The world often judges children according to outward characteristics. God looks deeper. Human beings see age, appearance, family background, wealth, and gender. God sees calling. Human beings see limitations. God sees possibilities. Human beings see present circumstances. God sees future purpose.
This is why parents must learn to look at children through God's eyes. When a child is born, parents should celebrate. They should thank God for the precious gift that has entered their lives. But beyond celebrating the child's gender, they should begin asking a more important question, "Lord, why did You send this child?" That question can transform parenting.
A parent who asks that question becomes a student of God's purpose. Instead of forcing plans onto the child, the parent begins seeking God's direction. Instead of comparing the child with others, the parent begins observing the unique qualities God has placed within the child. Instead of demanding conformity, the parent begins nurturing individuality according to God's design.
Many parents become disappointed because their children do not fit expectations. A father may want his son to love the same things he loves. A mother may want her daughter to follow the same path she followed. Sometimes children cooperate with those expectations. Sometimes they do not. When they do not, conflict arises. Yet much of that conflict would disappear if parents remembered that children belong to God before they belong to their families.The child was not sent to fulfill the dreams of parents. The child was sent to fulfill the purpose of God.
This truth requires humility. It requires parents to admit that they do not have complete knowledge of the child. Only God does. It requires them to spend time praying, observing, listening, and learning. It requires them to understand that every child is carrying something from God that deserves careful attention.
Purpose often reveals itself gradually. It may appear in a child's interests. It may appear in natural abilities. It may appear in compassion toward certain people. It may appear in unusual curiosity about particular subjects. Sometimes the signs are visible early in life. Sometimes they become clearer over many years. Whatever the case, wise parents remain attentive. They understand that they are not simply raising a boy or a girl. They are raising a person sent by God for a specific reason.
This understanding also protects children from feelings of worthlessness. When people define themselves only by external characteristics, they can easily become discouraged. Appearance changes. Social status changes. Human opinions change. But purpose remains. A child who understands that God created him or her for a reason develops a deeper sense of value. That child begins to understand that life is meaningful because God does nothing without purpose.
Every child needs to hear this truth repeatedly. Children need to know that they are more than their appearance. They are more than their family name. They are more than their academic performance. They are more than their gender. They are individuals created by God with purpose, value, and destiny.
The greatest gift parents can give their children is not wealth, education, or influence, though those things may be helpful. The greatest gift is helping children discover why God created them. A child who understands purpose possesses something more valuable than money. That child possesses direction. Purpose gives meaning to success and strength during difficulties. Purpose helps a person remain focused when life becomes confusing.
As parents, guardians, grandparents, teachers, and caregivers, we must train ourselves to see beyond gender. We must learn to see children as God sees them. We must celebrate the fact that they are boys or girls while never forgetting that their greatest identity is not found in gender but in the purpose for which God sent them. The question heaven asks about every child is not merely, "Is this a boy or a girl?" The greater question is, "What assignment has God attached to this life?"
When we begin asking that question, we start raising children according to God's design rather than according to human expectations. And when children are raised according to God's design, they have a much greater chance of becoming everything God intended them to be.